When people tell me of a change they’re planning on making, whether it’s a move, job change, or anything really, I get excited for them and tend to encourage them to go for it. It’s like, yay! Go! Adventure! Embrace change! Change is good!
Hopefully, I don’t come across as pushy or being supportive only if their final decision is to make the change. The truth is, I support whatever decision that person makes if it’s what will ultimately make him or her happy. I think the important part isn’t whether or not you decide to make the change; I think it’s really about being open to the possibility and really thinking about which option is better for you.
I’ve got a friend who’s torn about leaving here and moving to Texas because she feels like she just established herself, just found some pretty awesome people and found love for the crossfit kool-aid. I know exactly how that feels since that was pretty much my situation shortly before moving here. My response to her is that these awesome people she just met (like moi!) will make an effort to stay in touch and that if her heart tells her to go to Texas, she should definitely go for it. Of course I’m going to miss her, especially given that we’ve just recently started to hang out and get to know each other, but hey! That’s what airplanes and road trips are for!
Then I have two other friends who were considering quitting their jobs and taking another job position elsewhere. Both of them were leaning heavily towards taking the other position, for the usual reasons: tired of the current job, felt like they needed the change, seemed to have more opportunities, etc. And of course, my natural inclination being to encourage people to go for it, I was very supportive and encouraging for them to make a change. Then after some thought and self-reflection, they both realized that they actually didn’t want to leave. The other opportunity wasn’t actually as good as it seemed, and I am proud of them for being able to look at what seemed like a new golden opportunity and say, “you know what, nah. What I have is actually pretty damn good. I’m going to stay.”
I think it takes a certain courage to be able to say no to something that may seem like such a great opportunity, because at the back of your mind you think to yourself, “but what if this kind of opportunity doesn’t come up again?” The way I see it, opportunities are everywhere. It doesn’t mean you need to take it if the timing isn’t right yet or it’s not quite what you’d like. It’s ok to stay put and not take it. I really believe that when one door closes, another opens. And if not, well shit, go for the window.